Category Archives: What the hell??!!

The legend of the white snake

I'm a shedding snake. Only my lips that is.

Just today, while reading forums and blogs, my fingers couldn't stop being itchy, so I rubbed all my peeling skin off my lips. Not that painful just in case you were wondering whether it would be painful or not. I had loads of lipbalm on my luscious Shu Qi-like lips so it was easy to rub off the skin. Now, there is literally a pile of dead lip skin on my table. Wish I could take a pic, but wouldn't want you to puke on your saliva.

My lips are peeling like mad!!! Just in case you don't already know, I'm on Oratane, an acne medication that halts sebum production. And it doesn't specifically target skin. So dry cracked up lips is just one of the side effects unfortunate and poor me has to suffer.

And now, not only do I look like Shu Qi, I think I'm leaning more to the luo han fish side now. My forehead does stick out (pple say these kinds people are smart hehe) and now my lips are swelling out so tada!! You can call me Shu Qi the luo han fish.

Lame lah I know. But I have to complain lah. I hope I don't get peeling skin all over, if not you REALLY can call me luo han fish. (peeling skin=scales for those who don't get it) And then, I would have the good excuse of forgetting things. (ask ur fren if don't get this)

So xian. Mia and I went to City Plaza on Friday. But due to time constraints and me being the most filial daughter in the world (had to go back to cook dinner), we only managed two stories. Level one wasn't that interesting and their prices weren't fantastic either. And there was just this one shop. Haiyah. I tell you, Friday wasn't a good day. It was a day of BAD LUCK and thus = grumpy and cranky shu. I start from beginning lah huh.

I had to go out to meet one buyer. sell her my stuff. As I walked out, it started to drizzle. I pulled out my foldable umbrella. THen I realised that I forgot my handphone, so about turn I went, by the time I was nearing home? The heavens literally was pouring buckets, no make them tanks of water down and my poor feeble umbrella wasn't doing much of its job. Got back, half wet, grabbed phone. Mopped a bit, deciding whether I should wait, but buyer smsed me to ask if I was coming. K. Took my dad's golf umbrella (which I lost in City Plaza while happily shopping) and went.

Now, you would think that the golf umbrella would be sufficient to cover me. I am not THAT big right? No, you are wrong. I was drenched. People, do not underestimate the power of cars. Especially the Merz cab. Not only can it drive you from one spot to another, it also has the ability to wet innocent walking pedestrians who have no where to hide. THere you go. I became from half drenched to almost drenched. Just my luck.

Met my buyer, did the transaction. Walked to Mia's house. By the time it stopped raining and poor me was half drenched walking down Orchard Rd.

Decided to go City Plaza. Went down. Entered this shop where Mia thought she would go crazy. Ok. Took a shoe which I thought was quite nice to try. The salesgirl came to tell me I couldn't wear it outside.. I got pissed. Went to complain to Mia. Salesgirl knew I was mad. Salesgirl told Mia I couldnt' walk on tiled floor and cannot wear the ONE SIDE OF THE SHOE outside. I got MORE mad. Cos? I think its stupid. Use your bloody brain. WHAT can I do with ONE SIDE OF THE SHOE? Why do I want to run away with ONE SIDE OF THE SHOE? How to sell? I have one foot meh? And plus, the shop wasn't like FANTASTIC, the price was what you can find in FEP or ORchard.And they were concerned about spoiling the DISPLAY ONE SIDE OF THE SHOE SHOE.My god. Please lah. I think even shops in heartland centrals don't even display this kind of rules. And if you have these kind of rules? WRITE IT DOWN AND DISPLAY IT FOR FUCK SAKE.

This was only one thing I was annoyed at. I was pretty annoyed already cos the girl started to FOLLOW us, not far away, but like almost a shoulder's length away. So, I told her to you know, don't follow us so closely lah. I think she took it to be, hey don't follow me so closely, I AM GOING TO RUN AWAY WITH YOUR ONE SIDE OF THE SHOE!!

Aiyoh. THen, I lost my umbrella. Then i had to go back at the peak of my shopping. You know that feeling? So now, I feel so mm kum kuan. I'm going back!!

ok damn long post siah. Gotta go. Wanted to write about something more melancholic more solemn but aiyah, yue jiang yue shen qi…

k. leave u with another mtv to watch!!
Yuan Dian by Tanya and Stefanie

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Fearless Ants

Let me tell you a story.

Recently, like for the past month, there have been big black ants running about my bathroom and the kitchen downstairs. What I mean bout BIG is big- like about at least 1-2 cm long, gigantic ants. These ants have been like roaming my bathroom, jumping on my shower puff and giving me a scare while I soap myself and embarassingly, one actually crawled up my leg while I was having diarrhea ( that time when I was really sick), bit me on my arse, and hopefully died due to the fountain of poo coming its way. Haha.very funny.

These ants as I have observed, all came from a hole at the door frame where termites reside. But if the pest control people have been doing their job, there should be some poison there and no termites should be happily doing their daily rituals like mating there. But somehow or rather, these ants seem to thrive. Maybe they are feeding on the termites' dead bodies. *shrugs shoulder*

Ok, you might be wondering why I'm telling you some grandma story.

Well, just a few days ago, there were A LOT of dead bodies of these ants SCATTERED all over the floor. Some were just not moving, some were struggling to stay moving. There can only be 2 possible reasons:
1. Dying from the poison in the hole AND in the termites.
2. I only see them seasonally.As in only certain times of the year. Maybe this is the time where their time is up.

So, I was happy cos they weren't annoying me. I left the dead bodies as they were because I was lazy lah- I thought when the part-time cleaner comes, all she can do is use water and wash them all away.

Yesterday. I went in and ALL the 'dead bodies' started moving again!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My goodness. So, I took some toilet paper, picked them all up and threw them into the WC and flushed them down.

Went back to the bathroom again. 2 ants DIDN'T survive the flush!

I tell you, these ants are immortal.

Ok lah. Any person will tell me, these ants probably did consume the poison. Either orally or by sheer diffusion, I don't know. But these ants are bloody strong, almost immortal. Their bodies probably accumulated the poison till one day they became paralysed. but see, I don't know whether ants have livers and kidneys lah, me no entomologist, but their livers/kidneys metabolised the poison and they resurrected! They would have if I didn't flush them down the toilet. This is my theory lah. Using my warped sense of biology.

To end my story, I leave you with this:
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The theme song of Fearless by Jay Chou. (click on Fearless to watch the MTV ah.) To the fearless and almost immortal ants.
You can go goo ga over him lah… huo huo huo huo huo huo huo!!!

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