Am in my mum's office now. Being a temporary coolie…took this off the notice board outside:
'Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma-which is living with the results other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of other people's opinions drown out your own inner value. And most importantly, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.'
Which is what I have been thinking this few days.
Pressure. Pressure to conform. Pressure to go find a boyfriend, pressure to do this, do that.
I don't like.
It's not that I want to be different or completely stand out. I just want to live the way I want it to be – values that I hold and stand by, principles.
Values and principles bring you nowhere you might say, but I would like to think that, at my deathbed, cliche as it may be, I can look back and think to myself, I lead a life that is true to myself.
I'm sure many have heard of this 'saying' – be yourself. no one does it better than you do.
It sure is easier living in someone's steps, someone's values-at least you don't have to think it out. And it is tiring to stand by your own values – it is but easier to succumb to the pressures people around you give and it is much easier just being a sponge.
What is having a boyfriend mean to me?
What is going to ZOuk mean to me?
What does SOCIALISING mean to me?
What does wearing G-strings mean to me? All just a tool to not have a VPL. But one great tool to get an infection.
See, life to people of my parents' and grandparents' generation is all about reproduction. Hurry up get someone to marry so we can chuan zhong jie dai. Now, life isn't that simple anymore. Women don't stay at home, sweep the floor, cook, take care of the baby and wait for their breasts to sag, women have careers, have a say and opinion. Life is much more complicated. Finding someone to be with is not easy and in fact, to some, it becomes a life time goal. Some want a lifetime partner, so they can have someone to lean on, some just need companionship.
I am not against that-in fact, it is good. BUT BUT BUT, I can't be so obscessed with it right?
Aiyah, I lost my train of thoughts. Someone just walked in and talked…………………….
Sleepy lah. Woke up at 6 just to get here.
Anyway, my bottom line is – live your values, your principles. Not the world's, society's. Not unless your principle is: follow the world. haha. then ok lah. Shui bo zhu liu.